Miss Mallory Meredith's Misinterpretations and Follies (Obscenities Included!)

In the many things I have been trying to prepare for my trip, one of them has been WHAT DO I DO WITHOUT VIDEO GAMES.

YES STOP JUDGING ME

For those who don’t fully understand, yes, I do consider video games to be enough a part of my life to worry about how I’ll feel about staying in another country 6+ months without playing. And, yes, I understand how ridiculous this sounds. And, yes, I’ve looked into the fees for shipping them abroad if I were to get settled in a country for a long while.

Just…go play Dragon Age, Skyrim, Zelda, Donkey Kong, Super Mario, God of War, Shadow of the Colossus, Crypt of the NecroDancer, Super Smash Bros, Goat Simulator, Gone Home, Banner Saga, BattleBlock Theatre…play games and you’ll understand why I’ll miss them so much. Except I now have the opportunity to actually have my own IRL RPG that isn’t an office simulator.

Better than Tool Time.

Video games are also a large part of my social life. Playing online allows me to keep up with friends who are further away, too. If you haven’t played Mario Kart 8 while talking to your friend via Google Hangout until 2am in the morning, you’re missing out on life’s best moments.

Either way, having decided that I wouldn’t bring along my gaming on the pilgrimage (only a tablet of some sort–my parents are determined to have some sort of technology for me to bring to keep in touch for the four to six weeks I walk 500 miles), I decided I do need something for the plane travel. And maybe as a security blanket.

Enter my wonderful n3DSXL. And the sad but convenient fact of Club Nintendo discontinuing.

I have never particularly cared for rewards programs. This is usually because they play a certain fiddle for a certain heart, but the music could never pluck my own strings to match their tune. They always seemed like scams to make more money. Probably because I didn’t care enough about their products.

Nintendo. Ah, Nintendo. You beautiful, tropical fish. You poetic and noble land-mermaid. You beautiful, talented, brilliant, powerful musk ox.

Their rewards system was the first one that I cared about. You buy games, do a quick survey on said games, then get coins to buy more games. And those games you buy with the coins? Bring about another quick survey to get coins again.

Best. Rewards. Ever.

Even though the status within the rewards won’t matter by April 1st, I was bound and determined to make Platinum since I only had 500 coins left for the year. Plus, I had an excuse–I need games to bring along for my trip. Win/Win.

There is just one problem: I’m playing the games I’m buying.

You, currently.

This is about the most fun counter-productive thing I’ve ever done. But here’s what I’ve been playing.

SteamWorld Dig. A revamp of Dig Dug with 3D 2D graphics. Stupidly fun. The ending is a bit tougher than the rest of the game (kinda shocked me), but everybody can enjoy digging all around different worlds to see what’s underneath. Yay treasure!

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney Trilogy. I got on this band wagon far too late. Friends had talked about the series, I just always ended up buying something else. But…Courtroom simulations! Who knew?! You play a bit of a detective, meet some funky characters, and, as everyone and their dog knows, objecting is the best part of the game. Particularly when it keeps going back and forth between you and the prosecutor. OBJECTION EVERYWHERE.

I do giggle every time Wright says, “Take that!” because it reminds me of Princess Peach from Mario Kart 64.

I ended up purchasing both the trilogy and Dual Destinies because they were on sale for a good price on Nintendo eShop.

Another World. This game originally came out when I was about, oh, four years old. However, here I am, 28, and excited for the 20th edition I hadn’t been aware was on Nintendo eShop. If you haven’t heard of this game, go look at it right now. It’s genius. Relentless. Satisfying to figure out. And it isn’t too terrible to look at, either. A lot of thought went into this game, and it shows. Well worth the praise it receives.

Warning: You’ll get frustrated. Puzzle platformers tend to be by nature. Worth it.

Brain Age Express: Arts & Letters. You know. For fun! (I had extra coins to use, and I had everything else I wanted. Still, I feel all smart playing it.)

I also picked up LoZ: Seasons/Ages, Super Mario Land, and Donkey Kong. I figure if I can’t take my GameBoy Color with me, I should take more of the games I played all the time on it with me.

I’m not going to talk about my addiction to Pokemon Shuffle. It’s embarrassing enough as it is.

However, I will say that I’m a bit excited for Nintendo to go mobile as it will bring into plan what I’ve wanted from Nintendo for years.

NINTENDOPHONE

Don’t even pretend you don’t want one. You’d be all over that like white on rice. We all would. The idea of it takes away the sadness that Zelda WiiU was delayed until at least 2016 (sadness, but ultimate happiness overall as I want that game perfected when she comes out).

But, hey. I made my Platinum status. And that’s all that really matters.

Nah, just kidding. I’ll find something else to complain about later. Human nature and all that.

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